The dream of a classless and stateless society and a fixed roadmap towards the fulfilment of that goal may remind one of the genius of the first Marxist Karl Marx. Surely, his interpretations of history and class struggle and social discrepancies were skewed towards economic conditions of those times but one who has studied Karl Marx in depth cannot deny that he was both a realist and a utopian idealist. A realist because he depended his theories around the industrial revolution and capitalism rising scenarios which were quite factual of his times, although he forgo a big part of human motivations like culture, communitarianism, geographical conditions and psychology and changes in those spheres with changed areas of locality or nationality, yet he was quite good at planning his theory of class struggle in the history as well as his contemporary times around two existing classes. But when he talked about and interpreted a classless and stateless society, one could easily take him as a utopian theorist because first of all, state was made for the management of the masses and if there would have been a stateless society, there would have been much despised anarchy everywhere and the discrimination that he sought to end could get elevated; secondly, the means he talked about to reach that end i.e. revolution by the proletariat against the bourgeoisie, somehow after being in power the proletariat could take the character of the bourgeoisie and would have begun to abuse that economic power in their hands, thus still the struggle would have persisted with the places exchanged between haves and have-nots where only the people would have exchanged their positions yet the characters of exploitation by haves of have-nots staying stuck that pattern only. The idea of a classless and stateless society was undoubtedly praise-worthy but in a society where the human motivation is not only determined by economic factors but also by the greed to be in power over others, it was certainly utopian because no matter how many people be egalitarian in their approach, still the forces who want to over-power others sustain in society contradictorily to the former and which can be meted out with the struggle for power since times immemorial.
Work smart, not hard.” I am sure that you have come across this saying at least once by now, or if you are following quotation pages on any kind of social media platforms, then more than once. But what does it exactly mean? Does smart work replace hard work everywhere and in every task? Can it do so? What if something needs to be done with high precision? What if even after having enough tools and sources of accomplishing a task smartly, you still cannot complete it without paying attention to every single detail and without putting all your efforts and time into it? Actually, only smart work works only in a few thing, that too, if its already done once by somebody else. You can really make and do something smartly by using the available gadgets and information for doing something but the hard work required to do that thing cannot always be replaced by smartness. For example, if you have to make an architectural design of a house, you can have access to and use all the applications on computer to make the design but won’t you have to use your mind and take your time to make an original design through to its perfection? You will have to. Let’s take another example, if you are preparing for an exam and you have access to all the information required to get good grades in that exam and you know what is more important and what is not so important keeping in mind the previous patterns of that exam but what if the old questions don’t repeat again? You will certainly get lower grade than expected. Here, if you would have studied the whole of the syllabus rather than considering only a good portion crucial for preparation, you could have gotten better grades. Let’s take one more example- suppose you are an artist and you know what you want to paint on a canvass, you have seen many tutorials on the internet about how to do it in simpler and easier manner, but still you will have to put all of your efforts to paint it according to your chosen style and desired end product and it may take you days, weeks, or even months for its completion.
What I am pressing upon here is it’s not always that you can choose smart work over hard work. One needs to coagulate smart work with hard with in order to excel in anything. Choosing smart work over hard work for everything may make your end product or outcome mediocre sometimes because it’s already tried and tested by somebody else. While choosing only hard work may be hectic and overly pressing on you, choosing only smart work may be too easy and useless; achieving excellence and getting exceptional results in anything needs both hard and smart work in consonance with each-other.
“Take it easy!”,”Chill !!” – The phrases you often listen to whenever you react to someone’s statements that can offend boundaries set by you in your relation to that person. Such a person might be a total stranger, a colleague, relative, friend or lover. What boundaries you have set in your dealings with that person are not meant to be crossed for any reason whatsoever. They might give you the random chill in your spine by intimadating you or might lead your temper to rise or may make you numb in a way that you stay stunned about what to say or how to respond to such a stimulus.
And when you react to it with anger or even affirm your boundaries again, then they try to teach you how to chill and not to take life too seriously. Sometimes, they affirm you that they have gone through great ordeals that you have no idea about and still they are capable of playing around. Actually, they are just playing around with their words or even emotions but seldom logic. Their pain does not entitle them to offend you. If their words are hurting your emotions or sentiments or feelings or you are plainly feeling misunderstood or made fun of or taken advantage of or manipulated with, it’s an offence to your person and their own pain is no excuse to inflict any pain upon you.
For a moment, you might give them another chance by giving due regard to their suffering as a benefit of doubt but that kind of behaviour might continue if not opposed or stopped at the first instance. They might play hooky under the veil of their pain or anger but it is not acceptable because you are not responsible for that pain and thus, it’s also not your duty to tolerate it for any measure.
For opposing or making it stop, you do not need to play the same. You don’t need to play mind games or get angry or play the blame game or be pitiful in any way. Be sympathetic and neutral simultaneously in whatever you say and the tone in which you say it.
For example; say
- “I have no idea what you have gone through but your pain does not entitle you to offend me and I found your behaviour offensive to my boundaries”
- “I would like to understand your reasons but still your this action/behaviour is unacceptable to me.”
- “I did not offend you, and I would appreciate it if you reciprocate the same.”
- “How would you feel if I offend your boundaries and then give excuse of my pain?”
And, if he or she still does not stop or get even more offensive or aggressive or passive aggressive then be a little more strict and say “Would you understand my dignified silence or you want me to react like you have reacted?”
What you say should be clear, and should give them a message that their behaviour is unacceptable whatever might be the reason behind it. But do not trigger their emotions or do anything to hurt them as it might worsen the situation altogether. Keep calm and be firm and unprejudiced in your approach.
When was the last time when you felt low emotionally and it was like your energy levels dropped drastically?? Last month, last week, yesterday, today or everyday?? You might be having depression or mood disorder or might be feeling plainly stressful all the time. In such situations you may or may not be liking to discuss the reasons behind your stress or strain. But anyhow if you try and discuss, you will meet with certain kinds of people and/or responses. You will find out that there would be some people who just want to see you physically fine, they have nothing to do with your mental or emotional well-being while others have nothing to do even with your physical well-being. And there will be a very few gems who want your wellness in both.
Here are some kinds of people and their reactions that you may get to know in such a situation:
- PEOPLE WITH INDIFFERENT ATTITUDE
There are some people who are with you only as long as you are capable of putting up a mask of happiness on your face and don’t show any kind of mood instability or stress and when you start showing up your insecurities and weaknesses, they avoid it like preventing themselves from an epidemic. They are the people with “hmmm.. It happens..”, “hmmm.. don’t worry”, “You don’t look good sad like this” kind of responses. I mean like really?? Are they even worthy of your time in general?? Leave alone your good times.
- MANIPULATIVE PEOPLE DESIRING TO CONTROL OTHERS
Another category comprises of those who are waiting for you to share something with them just so that they can bestow you with their useless ‘Wise Advice‘ that is not even wise in the first place, but they have to advise anyway. Trust me, they too have nothing to do with your emotional well-being. They are the people with “I had told you”, “I knew this”, “You should do this” kind of responses. And they give you advice that prove their point right that they have always wanted to impose on you. Thanks but no thanks to such people and their ego-serving advice.
- STUPID AND INSENSIBLE PEOPLE
And then, there comes another category of people who ‘just laugh out‘ on anything and everything you say. They are listening to you just for passing their free time. In fact, don’t even listen to you completely and are not interested in understanding you or your situation anyway.
- TRULY WISE PEOPLE
There are barely any people who can ‘JUST LISTEN‘ and do nothing else unless asked for something !! They are truly wise people who understand that you are alone and you need to be listened to. They do not advise you unless you ask them to do so. They are the ‘real treasure‘. If there are any other kinds of people that you have met in such a situation, then do let me know in the comments section.
Today I am here to discuss upon one of the very important goals of Fitness and life in general- WEIGHT LOSS ! We will do it summarily here in this post and can go into further details on your suggestions.
So, first of all, you have to make up your mind on these three pivotal questions before digging further into any kind of fitness regimen:
- how much weight do you have to lose to stay healthy?
- How much weight do you want to lose to feel good?
- In how much time do you want to reach your goal?
Trust me, once you think about and find out the answers to these 3 questions, you will find it very easy to follow through the techniques to reach your fitness goal and will feel highly motivated. After all, it’s your decision to be fit and you are going to achieve it !!
Coming to the First Part:
How much weight do you have to lose to stay healthy?
For this, get a check-up done from a medical practitioner and go through complete body tests especially lipid profile, thyroid functioning, lever functioning, haemoglobin, blood sugar level etc. so as to ensure that you do not have any medical condition specific to weight gain/loss and then use a BMI (Body Mass Index) calculator and BMI normal range indicator. Also, get your Fat Percentage checked from a medical practitioner or a gym trainer. This will let you know exactly how much fat weight you need to lose.
How much weight do you want to lose to feel good?
Apart from the healthy range of weight, there must be some weight goal in your mind that you think is going to make you feel better about your body and make you more attractive ( No offence here! You are already attractive, but I am talking about feeling “more” attractive here concerning your body only and you really want that 😉 ). Set a realistic target for this and never below your normal BMI range’s minimum weight. Somewhere in the middle of that range would be fine. But that should be a long-term goal. First set a short term goal like losing a few kilos from your big target to be achieved in a shorter span of time.
Here we come to the third part, i.e.
In how much time do you want to reach your goal?
As I have already said that you must decide a long-term goal and then cut it short into many short-term goals. The reasons for doing this are that, firstly, you still have no idea what kind of plan is going to work for you (because you have not tried anything yet), so you will have to go through some trials and errors to find the best possible method. Secondly, you will not feel over-burdened with a big goal. Big goals can be achieved in a long term and that needs sheer consistency and there is a great chance of being divergent from your weight loss goal or worst-give up on it. Shorter durations of control over your diet and maintaining a fitness regimen of exercise are easier to be achieved. Moreover, you will feel motivated when you will achieve your short-term fitness goals. Short-term fitness goals ideally should be 1 week goal. But, in case you have shorter time or you don’t have that kind of control over your cravings or you can’t be consistent with exercise then, a 3 days goal is perfect for you just for you to test if it works for you or not. If you start liking your 3-days or 1 week routine, then that’s great, carry on with it. But, if you don’t feel like doing it anymore or you think that it’s putting a lot of pressure on you or you can’t be happy in that kind of routine, then switch to a new plan. Go with which plan makes you happy because you have to adopt it as a lifestyle so that after losing weight you can keep it off without getting hard on yourself and love it too.