Silence or speaking up-which way to choose?

There will be times when you will be speaking the truth and nobody will believe you, and then, there will be times when you won’t be able to speak about it and many people would like to know about it.

Society works like this only. People have the tendency to go against your free will. They would like you to explain yourself in front of them to do something that is your right, like they are an authority over you. You really owe explanations to a few people including your family members and closest friends for a few of your actions that may affect them directly or indirectly, but what about other friends who just observe what you do and have something to say about it always even when nothing you do concerns them? What if your neighbourers or colleagues want to know the deals going on in your life with others despite you trying to keep it private from them? AND what if you want to tell something to any of them, and none of them believes what you have to say? It certainly becomes exhausting when others think that they know your truth or THE TRUTH better than you do. You try to explain yourself over and over again, everybody turns a deaf ear to you but when you get tired of all the things you go through and turn silent, then all of a sudden the same people who disregard your truth become interested in knowing why you became so silent.

black and white black and white depressed depression
Silence is not always peaceful, sometimes it kills you from the inside-YOUR CHOICEST LIFESTYLE.

Due to this kind of communication gap and lack of understanding and timing, people go through episodes of depression as they are unable to share their problems openly to anyone at the right time bravely (fear of judgements) but when they learn to live with those problems or solve them on their own, then others want to know about them just out of curiosity. Those who really lend an ear do not do it out of curiosity but for understanding the other person but those people are rare to find. A person may shut out and shut down due to fear of being misunderstood or misjudged and it may lead to further misunderstandings with even those people and at those place where they were never meant to happen.

What to do when you have something to say and you feel like you have lost your voice as you think that nobody is going to believe you? PLEASE, SPEAK UP ! As simple as that.

angry woman yelling into loudspeaker on blue background
Speak up your mind, loud and crystal clear-YOUR CHOICEST LIFESTYLE.

I am writing this out of experience. Speak your truth whenever you feel that the opportunity is right. Do not let your anxiety stunt your mind or shun your own voice. It may lead to depression and further anxiety. Do not think that you will look or sound like a fool. Be polite first. Talk sense. Think if it’s logical and factual or not. Even if it is not, just say it. You can keep a disclaimer with whatever you express about its uncertainty as well. No need to over-think for too long that it becomes too late to talk about. Other people may take advantage of your silence and it may yield to your disadvantage in ways you cannot comprehend whilst staying silent. Talk to a trusted person first of all, then to the people who you intend to divulge your information or truth to. Be crystal clear in whatever you want to let out of your mouth. When you are completely clear about what you want to say, others can grasp it; if you keep beating around the bush, then most certainly people are not going to take it as the truth. But say it anyway. Different people have different ways, so do you but do it at the right time or you may repent later that you missed the right time and lost a lot with your silence. You have the freedom of speech, use it ! Nobody is important enough to shun you out of your truth.

love your life clipboard decor
Life is too short to not speak up your mind; when it will end, nobody will know what you had in store-YOUR CHOICEST LIFESTYLE.

Karl Marx’s end goal-realistic or idealistic?

The dream of a classless and stateless society and a fixed roadmap towards the fulfilment of that goal may remind one of the genius of the first Marxist Karl Marx. Surely, his interpretations of history and class struggle and social discrepancies were skewed towards economic conditions of those times but one who has studied Karl Marx in depth cannot deny that he was both a realist and a utopian idealist. A realist because he depended his theories around the industrial revolution and capitalism rising scenarios which were quite factual of his times, although he forgo a big part of human motivations like culture, communitarianism, geographical conditions and psychology and changes in those spheres with changed areas of locality or nationality, yet he was quite good at planning his theory of class struggle in the history as well as his contemporary times around two existing classes. But when he talked about and interpreted a classless and stateless society, one could easily take him as a utopian theorist because first of all, state was made for the management of the masses and if there would have been a stateless society, there would have been much despised anarchy everywhere and the discrimination that he sought to end could get elevated; secondly, the means he talked about to reach that end i.e. revolution by the proletariat against the bourgeoisie, somehow after being in power the proletariat could take the character of the bourgeoisie and would have begun to abuse that economic power in their hands, thus still the struggle would have persisted with the places exchanged between haves and have-nots where only the people would have exchanged their positions yet the characters of exploitation by haves of have-nots staying stuck that pattern only. The idea of a classless and stateless society was undoubtedly praise-worthy but in a society where the human motivation is not only determined by economic factors but also by the greed to be in power over others, it was certainly utopian because no matter how many people be egalitarian in their approach, still the forces who want to over-power others sustain in society contradictorily to the former and which can be meted out with the struggle for power since times immemorial.

A good life partner for people with high conscience- Behavioural Analytical View.

A good life partner is someone almost everybody desires at some point of his/her life. The definition of a ‘good life partner‘ is something subjective to every person, and so is about who ideally the right one. But what is that common characteristic trait or pattern that you should really seek in a life partner and how can you identify the same? Let’s discuss it here in depth-

crop elegant ethnic woman embracing male beloved

A good test of knowing who is the right one for you is that the wrong one will keep you stuck or bring your ego (rational part of consciousness) to your id level i.e. seduction, sex, jealousy, vengeance, anger, insignificant or one-sided or two or multi-faceted competition, aggression, physical neediness and desires. That actually is already in you by birth, which is later on suppressed due to development of healthy ego (rationality). It does not need to be evoked by someone else. If a person evokes any of these desires in you more than you need to, then that person is not the right one for you, because if you stay inclined to this state of mind for the majority of span of time or energy, then you can barely do something that your super-ego wants you to do.

Specially when you have developed knowledge of your own super-ego i.e. your morals, values, principles, what makes you feel guilty, conscientiousness, etc., and you live in this realm most of the time, then it is difficult for you to shift your energy towards id. Release of id is also important but the right person for you will never drive you in that state forcefully and will not behave in such a way that brings your focus (ego’s work) to id every now and then, with fluctuations in his/her own behaviour.

advice advise advisor business

This analysis is just a small portion of the whole criteria that one can set for recognizing the right partner for them. We will discuss more later on.

How the existing generations are weak mentally?

Ever thought how weak and petty we as a whole of existing generations have become? We get depressed on very minor things, that too very soon. You did not get good marks, a job, some money, got rejected, felt unloved or did not get a specific desired result in any realm of life, you just drop your whole vibe instantly.

photo of man touching his head

Why? Don’t you think that you have become really weak mentally? Is life all about this petty stuff? Do you ever get out of the things that only serve you? Why so much of selfishness? I know we are all selfish and must be to some extent but what I observe is that we are too selfish to be tolerated by others. In the ancient and medieval times, our ancestors worked so hard, that too, for the betterment of human beings as a whole. They lived for themselves for sure, they too were selfish, but not as much as we have become. They were very strong people. There were great difficulties in their life. There was little to no knowledge of medicine(allopathy), no technology, little to no communication outside one’s tribe; they had to fight even for basic neccessities of life. We are in comparison to them manifolds privileged yet manifolds petty mentally. Their mental strength was commendable, capable of breaking mountains which they literally did. For us? who find it difficult to drive a car or bike or anything for a couple of hours. Sometimes even picking up a tv remote is too difficult. We have evolved into lazy, procrastinating, weak people. Not all, but a large majority of people is.This really exasperates me because we are not even soft. Many of us won’t mind even killing somebody for serving their selfish motives, if it was legal. Our minds play tricks on us and it’s not about a few people only, our collective consciousness has grown weaker with time. Soft by heart yet strong by mind is something really commendable (though heart pumps only blood, but I had to use it as a clichè.) We don’t move with purpose, we move on adopted patterns of society. There are bigger things that we are too afraid of doing, because they involve a mass of people who cannot give us anything in return and we don’t want to do something which does not serve us. Even if we do, we do it to show it to others that how helpful we are. Moreover, people have become so delicate mentally that whenever they go through any emotionally chaotic situation and they, more or less, have to go through it because nothing can be done about it, they think or say that they survived. I really want to ask them what they survived actually?? There were times in history when the words “I survived” were used to describe survival of human beings in jungles having no food, clothing or shelter, and the survival during wars, drought, flood, plague, holocaust, etc. In the contemporary times, when we are way too privileged than our previous generations, people say that they survived only when they have to go through even a single failure be it in career or relationships or otherwise. I can only say in the end that Science and technology is getting better and we, regarding personal mental capabilities, are being worse, or to say again, too weak, shallow and petty.

BETTER ALONE THAN IN BAD COMPANY

thoughtful young woman drinking coffee near window on gloomy day
Photo by JESSICA TICOZZELLI on Pexels.com

Why some people prefer to stay alone despite having great personalities? Why some people are loners despite having a friendly nature? Why some people stay isolated for long periods of time despite having too many people on their social media platforms and big families? Apart from extreme introversion, what can the reason be and why do they prefer loneliness?? The answer lies in this saying “Better alone than in bad company.” No matter how you feel, you need to stay away from bad people. Bad here refers to both bad vibes and bad behaviour. Sometimes, no matter how much good you try to see in people, sooner or later, they show their true colours. You might feel that it’s too late to cut them off of your life because you have gotten attached to them or have a common business or you need them professionally; but to be stable and protect your sanity, you will have to get rid of people who can bring any kind of negativity in you. Some gossip to you, some gossip about you. Some poke and prod on your boundaries; physical, emotional or mental. Even if you make it very clear time and again that you want them to be completely absent from your life, they don’t, they still want to get negative attention from you. Some find irritating you as something funny. Some think that their unhealthy or psychotic ways are just a way to show love. Some think that nudging here and there, taunting, is okay. Some think that commenting on your lifestyle is casual. But trust me, if you are a sensitive yet strong person, you can and you have to cut them all off your life, no matter how hard it seems to you, and no matter how difficult they make it for you. When you have got a mind and body naturally capable of doing everything, you can live alone till the right ones who behave the right way come to you. Behaving the right way depends on how you want to be behaved with, and not how others think they should behave and if somebody does not behave or treat you the way you want to be treated, then you have to cut them off of your life, sometimes permanently if somebody doesn’t get your point or gets it and still carries on with their immature, toxic and stupid behaviour. You also have got things to do, live your life freely and grow. They will also try to manipulate you or use you in the name of integrity, but your inner integrity should be stronger than anybody else’s manipulation. Your growth should not be stunted by any bad influence by others on you; and their behaviour is not your responsibility, its theirs and thus it’s not your responsibility to carry on with their toxicity and tolerate it, rather it’s your responsibility towards yourself to cut off such people from your life even if you have to live alone.